Future

Remember my latest blog? About not having a job? Well, I've got a job. It's for saturdays only, and when they need me I need to be available throughout the entire week. Last week, I worked three days. And this week, I'm back to only saturday. The mornings are early, I start at 7 AM so I gotta start cycling at 6:30 AM. And tomorrow we'll be starting at 6:45 AM  because it's almost Sinterklaas & Christmas is coming up. I'm pleased with the job. I got nice colleagues and it pays well enough. And even though there is hardly any change (yet) in my finances (I haven't started saving up yet.), I feel more complete. I feel like my life is coming together a little more. And that's really risky, because I could literally get a call tomorrow to hear that I have lost my job because they don't need me anymore. I don't have a contract, I don't have anything that makes the job mine.

I am thinking about the future more. I don't want to just yet, but it just happens. I want a place for myself, I want to pay off my dept which I got from quitting studies and I really want to have financial security and stability. I just want to see a future of myself. I know that in this job, there's no future for me, within this company. Mainly because I work for an employment agency. They can replace me with anyone in their system, even if I'm working hard. Of course that scares me but I've been taking this risk to get kicked out and lose sight of my future again and I will continue to do that for the next couple of weeks if they still need me. And I'm gonna honestly say that I am motivated, happy and willing to more forward more than ever right now.

I want to thank everyone for their support and kind words. And some even reached out and helped me, which I very much appreciate. I will not stop searching for an other job, which gives me more stability.

--this was written & posted on friday--